Saturday, June 28, 2008

How Did I Get it All Wrong?

It's interesting that after we found out Ellie was sick (which she isn't), and had to turn down the referral, I spent a long time wondering how in the world I got God's messages so wrong. I said that to my Sunday school teachers this week when we were talking about our newest development in finding out she does not have a disease and will be able to come home with us. I said, "I was struggling with God because I felt so certain that His messages to me were so clear and that, without a doubt, this was our daughter." My soul's biggest problem was, "How did I get it all wrong?"

I wonder, in life, if sometimes we miss the signs God is sending our way or if we mis-interpret them into what we want them to be? I have continued to struggle with that portion of what happened with Ellie's situation. I don't struggle in knowing that she IS our daughter. I think we are SO VERY clear on that. Her story is one that is nothing short of miraculous. I've just been reading back through this blog and I see references to occurrences where I note that this is definitely a sign from God that He has fulfilled a promise to us (our rainbow), or the dream I had the night she was born. I had absolutely no doubt at that time that it was a clear communication to me. I still don't have doubt about those things, but I wonder how many things we miss that He sends our way -- or worse, how many things we get wrong. It has just disturbed me and was something I wanted to share in case others have input they would like to share.

But, to clear up any doubts you might have after reading this, we KNOW this little Princess is OUR daughter - hand picked from God for our family.

2 comments:

Mom to 2 Angels said...

I often wonder the same thing. Sometimes I wonder if I am reading signs into things just because I want them to be there. For me, it happens so often that I see all the signs (a lot of them I missed) after the fact. But, that doesn't mean they weren't there, it just means I wasn't that great at looking.

Margaret and Tom said...

It is hard to see God's plans until you have that hindsight, but the only thing that matters now is that Ellie IS your daughter and it has been God's plan all along :) yes even before you or I were born, I truely believe that!